This is not what I intended . Got to a place I was so suicidal that I began to look up ways and means and methods to kill myself . Um , and I even had a suicidal uh , experience there where I decided I was gonna slash or slip my wrist .
I mean , I mean , and I was even worse than that . I was like , to your point , I was depressed for so long and I was suicidal for so long . I mean , it was , uh , something I thought the depression , at least I thought I'd grow out of it , you know , you think , well , I just need to accomplish more , you know , getting good grades isn't enough .
And he said , no , no , no , he was like , Rob , you don't know , like you just shared this story and today was gonna be the day and I was like , today was the day for what he was like . Today was the day that I was gonna kill myself . Today was the day and his dad looked at him , I'm like , shocked , of course .
Got to a place I was so suicidal that I began to look up ways and means and methods to kill myself . Um , and I even had a suicidal uh , experience there where I decided I was gonna slash or slip my wrist . And I , um you know , I dug the knife into my wrist and I mean , strangely enough in that moment , I experienced like this inexplicable , ineffable , peace , love and joy , the kind of which I had never experienced before that I had never experienced even when I was achieving accomplishment acquiring all these other things to beautiful German cars and health and all this stuff .
And then I got a little bit into the story that I got into with you . I got , you know , I shared that story with him around the depression and suicide and suicidal experience . And um I fell off a son right to my right there was a , a young man standing there with him and I didn't really notice right away and uh apparently it was his son and someone was getting really upset , really worked up .